After We Collided
Director: Roger Kumble
Writer: Anna Todd (novelist) and Mario Celaya
Starring: Josephine Langford (Hannah Baker’s little sister), Hero Fiennes Tiffin (he-who-shall-not-be-named’s nephew), Dylan Sprouse (tbh I don’t know if he played Zach or Cody off the top of my head, and I’m not gonna cheat and look it up), Selma Blair, Louise Lombard, Shane Paul McGhie
Reason for watching: hate-watching and first viewing of a new release
Number of times I’ve watched it: this will be the only time I shall see this until President Dwyane Johnson takes office
***
Initially, I wanted to talk about how fan fiction is just another way for artists to express themselves and give some love to the stories and settings they are into. Unironically, I am fine with that. And therefore I am unironically fine with movies like After We Collided, the follow up to 2019’s After. (Basic plot summary for you: Teresa meets bad boy Hardin in college; they fall for each other; start dating; she finds out their relationship was based on a dare he took; and she breaks up with him; and the newly released and aforementioned sequel picks up from there.) The internet is an amazing place and as long as you are not being a creep or pervert, I think writing ridiculous love stories is your business. Plus it’s the internet. If I don’t wanna read it, I just won’t search for it.
But last year (the before times as it were), it was mid-April, Shazam had just come out; and there were two weeks before Avengers: Endgame was coming out. So the movie releases were basically getting out of the way before Endgame destroyed the box office, and there was a vacuum that needed filling. I looked over the releases at the nearby movie theater and saw After was playing. Now I had not heard of this movie before, and that is a thing that almost never happens. My youtube account subscribes to three different channels that only post movie trailers. I see a lot of trailers. So then I did the next most logical thing and googled the movie…and much to my chagrin…I found out that this movie is based on FAN FICTION WRITTEN ABOUT ONE DIRECTION!!! I immediately had to see it, and it was not a good movie (but I’ll post about the original some other time). So again, when I heard there was a sequel movie in the pipeline, I had to see it.
A quick plot summary for After We Collided: Teresa (Josephine Langford) starts her new job at a publishing agency where she works with Trevor (Dylan Sprouse), and they form a friendship. Hardin (Hero Fiennes Tiffin) decides he can’t live without Teresa and sets out to win her back. And they actually turn around and put effort into their relationship. He tries new things, and she goes to family functions with him. They have a minor misunderstanding close to the end, but they ultimately stick together.
It’s still a cliche movie with overacting and unrealistic dialogue and circumstances. Plus it does not display healthy relationships for the presumably young fans who are into this franchise. Certain characters show up to perform one tasks and do nothing else. Trevor is actually looking out for Teresa most of the time when Hardin makes terrible decisions and jeopardizes their relationship. Teresa’s mother is only in one scene that I remember, and it’s just to scream at Teresa about how Hardin is a terrible person. Passion and lust can have it’s affects on you, but at a certain point those emotions wear off and those friends/family wear you down with logic.
Some positives though, Dylan Sprouse is actually funny in this movie. He’s got a few lines here and there to keep you interested and chuckle. At certain points you get a kick out of the absolutely ridicluous dialogue flying out of Teresa’s and Hardin’s mouths. I cannot in good faith recommend this movie though. Please, spend your money and time elsewhere.
3/10