Ocean’s Eleven, Twelve, and Thirteen
Director: Steven Soderbergh
Writer: Brian Koppelman, David Levien, George Clayton Johnson, Jack Golden Russell, Ted Griffin, Charles Lederer, Harry Brown, George Nolfi (sorry it’s a trilogy and there’s different writers on almost every movie)
Starring: George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Matt Damon, Julia Roberts, Andy Garcia, Al Pacino, Elliot Gould, Don Cheadle, Casey Affleck, Bernie Mac, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Carl Reiner, Shaobo Qin, and Vincent Cassel
Reason for watching: Great trilogy I haven’t seen before
Number of times I’ve watched it: First time viewing
***
What happens when Batman, Brad Pitt, the Runaway Bride, Jason Bourne, War Machine, Ross and Monica’s dad, the other Batman’s little brother, Bernie Mac, and Don Corleone walk into a casino three times? Well you get two nice heists, and I’m not really sure about the middle one.
To sum them up, these three movies are about a variety of different heists and cons that are pulled off by this crew. One time they rip off Andy Garcia. One time they rip off Vincent Cassel to repay Andy Garcia. Then they work with Andy Garcia to rip off Al Pacino in what I can only assume is a sequel/spinoff to The Godfather: Part III. It’s a heist. Usually it’s about the stealing. Sometime it’s about the stuff. Usually it’s not about either one. Which you would usually think is a recipe for disaster. But it’s not here. Except the second one.
Crime movies have this incredible array of things they can be about. Big time gangsters. Petty theft. Price fixing. Kidnapping. Leonardo DiCaprio screaming about something while pounding cocaine. Anything you can imagine can be turned into a crime movie. It’s a blank canvas where a writer can play all those dark and twisted fantasies that could get them in trouble with the NSA. But there is one thing that every crime movie is about: the criminal. For us as an audience to really get into a movie, we have to connect with the protagonist. Usually we develop that connection through a plot with nice arcs and storylines. But when you have a heist movie with the two of the most likable movie stars ever and a bullpen full of leading men and women who could do their own thing, you don’t need a great story.
This movie delivers great characters in spades. They are fun to watch and interact with. Clooney is so cool that he brings down the temperature of any room he’s in. Brad Pitt is the embodiment of suave. Matt Damon is a lite version of Will Hunting here, not a genius but definitely smart. Julia Garcia is no damsel in distress and her acting job as her character playing herself is hilarious (honestly it’s the one of the only great parts of the second movie). Andy Garcia is the scary criminal who would be your best friend if he likes you and your worst enemy if he didn’t. Don Cheadle is doing some crazy British accent here that makes no sense but his commitment to the bit is impressive and unbroken through all three movies. Casey Affleck does the goofy, smart guy well. This is just a good group to spend six hours and three movies with.
Quick ranking of each movie and then I’ll finish. Ocean’s Eleven is the only slow movie here but pairing that with how fun our characters are keeps you interested. Ocean’s Twelve has a terrific opening that gets right into the meat of the movie but you never have a clear distinction of what our gang is stealing or why. The whole things gets played off as a competition between Clooney and Cassel about who is the better thief, which does not get set up until the end of the second act which is way too late for that kind of thing. Ocean’s Thirteen gets back to the big job and we see more fun characters bounce off each other with the addition of Al Pacino. The last one gets knocked down a peg with the weird roofy drug they use on Al Pacino’s manager. I get it. You’re stealing, and you need to distract her. Still it’s not a cool tactic. Very un-woke of you.
7/10, 3/10, and 6/10 respectively.
Until I see another one.
PS - Soderberg put out another movie 10 years after Ocean’s 13 came out, and it was joking called “Ocean’s 7-eleven.” It’s better than these movies. No offense to them. But they have an even deeper cast and better jokes and a better heist. Go watch it. It’s on Amazon Prime.